I can work the googlemachine.

Perhaps I'm starting this blog out the wrong way.  Or maybe not the wrong way, but in the wrong direction.  Wait, those are the same thing.  Who knows -- I sling words.  I can't be held responsible for where I sling them or which words I sling.  Can I?

Anyway, let's try this:  I'll go around the world wild web a bit and pick out words I like, then sling them around a bit and see if you all like them.  All two of you.

First word!

Microgasm (urbandictionary.com)

An inferior sexual climax, usually very muted and of short duration, that leaves one generally unsatisfied or with a feeling of lack, the cause of which can vary, but some of the reasons can be: an unattractive partner, a particularly bad partner, lack of a partner, distraction/preoccupation with something else, severe intoxication, among others.

Very descriptive.  So descriptive it really doesn't need a description.  A play on "microcosm" and "orgasm", microgasm is clever, in addition to descriptive.

A microgasm is a sad thing, but a good word.  Though not as sad as the "nogasm", which I believe I just made up.

When in Chrome, do as you will

Google Chrome makes me happy in the pants.  At least it has for the 11 minutes I've used it so far.  It looks very Vista, but with less Vista and more Google.  These are good things as Google pretty much pwns, whereas Vista sucks a bag of dicks.  

Aww sweet!  The "Incognito" browsing window makes me even happier in the pants.  

"You've gone incognito. Pages you view in this window won't appear in your browser history or search history, and they won't leave other traces, like cookies, on your computer after you close the incognito window."

How cool is that?  I'm incognito RIGHT NOW.  You can't even see me.

I also appreciate the disclaimers, which warn of surveillance by secret agents AND people standing behind you.  Silly users, Google Chrome can't keep your girlfriend from reading over your shoulder.

Once I'm over the coolness of the new toy with the picture of the spy in the corner (he's very cute -- well-done graphic department), I'll likely never use Incognito.  I'll have to hit a whole 'nother key to open a new window, which I'm sure will prove to be more trouble than it's worth. Lazy>Nifty -- that's the way this story will play out.  Chrome itself, otoh, has already replaced my old browser on the toolbar.

Would you like some cheese with that wine?

It's a shame that the Black Lotus Brewing Company in downtown Clawson has only beer and wine. Some of you might not find this to be a shame, but I do. The beer is very good from what I hear, though.

I'm trying to find a place or two within, reasonable distance of teh_work, that can offer me an office-away-from-work. My boss lives out-of-state and isn't in town very much anymore, and all of the other people in my department have been casualties of the economy. No friends left to play with -- more sad face -- other than my fishy, Emperor Cerulean, who offers only moments of distraction. I get a little stir crazy locked away in my office, so getting out will help everyone. It will help me be happier and more social, which will increase productivity, which will make the corporates happy. And frequenting local establishments will help the economy, which I hear needs helping. Therefore, drinking while working: RATIONALIZED.

Anyway, I need a place that has, at a minimum, wifi, so I can work, and a bottle of vodka, scotch, rum, etc. with which to dampen my pallet. It should also have food. I realize I'm asking for a lot from suburbia.

I think I want to engage the kids at detroitdrinktank.com. I long for the days when I worked within the peoplemover loop, but sadly, I'm a bit further north during the day now, so making it down to their coverage area isn't quite so feasible. Field trips, though? For sure.

Black Lotus Brewing Company:

Pros: The pizza was (is) a nice, tasty snack, with highly decent mozzarella. In addition to a well-decorated interior, there is a patio with chairs and tables and other sorts of things one might find on a patio. Also, free WiFi.

Cons: The wine tastes like it came from a keg. It is also distinctly similar to the MOCAD wine they served during the Sea and Cake show. But I still had a refill, that's how committed I am.

Seriously, get off my lawn.

I'm pretty impressed (though most will be quick to point out, I'm easily impressed) by the functionality of blogger. I like that I can edit all the html, though I'm sad face because html has changed a lot since 1994. Gone are the days of Angelfire and Geocities. ...actually, they aren't. I tested the theory and my old Angelfire address still comes up with text I wrote in the 90s. Just as many pop-ups as ever. Thankfully, no references to my love of Get Used jeans or Hypercolor sweatshirts remain.

Finding the Angelfire site prompted a hunt of my other old domains. All are available still, aside from the only one I want back: zombieapocalypse.org. I'm even more sad face now. It used to be a public service site dedicated to aiding the masses in preparing for the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse. It's nothing of the sort now. The picture on the site states, "Remember KIDS GOD HATES ZOMBIES!!!....and also Minorities" Then it shows drawings of three people, hopefully done in MS Paint, labeled accordingly. The line at the bottom of the drawing "This message brought to you by westboro baptist church." Do not visit the Westboro Baptist Church website if you're at work -- I'm expecting a visit from my company's Diversity team within minutes. Remember the good ole days when bigots and racists couldn't figure out how to work the interwebs?

One dead, hundreds mourn, then go off to do other things

It's been months since I killed my old livejournal. Shot with words. High noon, tumbleweeds and all. It bled out all over the desk and there was weeping. But, it had to be done. eLjay had played out and I was ready to move on to a new town. A drifter on the interwebs.

Now there's this: The Wordslinger. I _plan_ to use this blog for rambling on about interesting and insignificant things and also to post photos of the same. Mostly to chronicle them for myself. I think it's mandatory for the first post to talk about how this is for the author and not for you, so that when no one reads it, said author doesn't feel like no one loves him. But for realz, this is for me. No, seriously. For me.